


7remix Challenge - No Virgins At All

by ComeBackWhen



Category: Final Fantasy VII
Genre: 7remix Challenge, Alternate Universe - Fantasy, Dragon!Angeal, Dragon!Genesis, Dragon!Sephiroth, Gen, M/M, remix of another work
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-26
Updated: 2016-11-26
Packaged: 2018-09-02 08:05:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,211
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8659153
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ComeBackWhen/pseuds/ComeBackWhen
Summary: My entry for the 7remix challenge. This is a remix of the story No Virgins At All by Ardwynna.When the Strife family offering goes awry, Cloud does the only thing he can do. He quickly realizes that the dragons are nothing like he had ever imagined... and they have some strange ideas about humans.





	

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [No Virgins At All](https://archiveofourown.org/works/709109) by [Ardwynna](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ardwynna/pseuds/Ardwynna). 



> Last month I signed up for the 7remix challenge on tumblr. I was assigned Ardwynna as my author to remix. Whoo boy was that intimidating… you see, I’ve admired Ardwynna as an author for a long time. Until reading her works, I hadn’t realized that AeriSeph was a thing and needless to say I was hooked. She has written a number of other fantastic works and I HIGHLY recommend looking her up for quality FFVII stories. 
> 
> Needless to day, I spent a while in a bit of a panic while I tried to figure out what I could do that would be good enough. There was one story in particular that always gave me a giggle when I read it. I’m a sucker for dragons, after all, and Soldier dragons are even better. It seemed perfect for the concept of the remix challenge and my mind immediately started putting together the events from the POV Cloud as well as adding a bit to the events directly before and after the story. Overall, I’m pleased with the silliness that ensued.
> 
> So, for your enjoyment, my remix of No Virgins At All by Ardwynna, a retelling and slight expansion of the events from Cloud’s POV. The concept, Soldier dragons and most of the dialogue belongs to her and I highly recommend reading the original for a good laugh. 
> 
> Also kudos to Icynovas for setting this whole thing up.

It was only his mother’s admonishment to behave himself ringing in his ears that kept Cloud Strife from mouthing off to Mayor Lockhart as he lectured Cloud on duty while they walked up the mountain path. His temper had always been short, but there was something about the mayor that especially rubbed him the wrong way on tithe day. Maybe it was because the Lockhart family never tithed. Mayor Lockhart claimed that having to deal with the dragons should count as tithe enough. Cloud disagreed, of course, but he seemed to be the only one. **  
**

It was a crime, really. The Lockhart’s lived very comfortably. The mayor and his daughter, Tifa, always had the best clothing, the choicest food, and plenty of gil to spare. The pair of chocobos his mother had told him to bring up the mountain would have given his family enough money for a better winter than they had seen in years. His mother looked pinched and lean most days as it was, and he was definitely still wearing his warm weather clothing because they did not have the money to replace the cold weather clothing he had outgrown last year. Their turn for the tithe could not have come at a worse time.

Of course, being eaten by a dragon would be much, much worse.

His mother had spent years working with a pair of chocobos, feeding them special greens and riding them through the perilous mountain paths. The day they had produced their first offspring, the feathers had been unmistakably green.

His mother had been so proud and she had put Cloud in charge of training the two green chickabos. They were so much faster than their parents and climbed the steep Nibel mountains with ease. Another few months and Cloud would have been able to take them over the mountain to Rocket Town or even on longer trips to Corel. He could have brought back supplies that Nibelheim could not easily acquire, selling them at a profit that would have given both of the kind of life his mother had always hoped for.

The chocobos were all his family had, so when Mayor Lockhart had reminded his mother that they were responsible for the tithe, there was nothing else to offer. His mother had simply said they would try again next season. The parents would be needed to produce the green feathered offspring again, so the young green pair were given up as a sacrifice to the dragons.

Claudia had quietly harnessed the two birds that morning, only asking that Cloud try to save the leather harnesses. They were already looking a little worn out, but they were better than nothing. Cloud had wanted to fight it, had wanted to find some other way, but Claudia was quick to remind him of their duty to the town. He knew she was right, but it still drove him crazy to lose all their hard work.

He had been too deep in his own thoughts and had missed Mayor Lockhart’s warning as they approached the plateau where the dragons always came to pick up their offerings. His grip on the leads had been too loose. When the distant dragon roared and the chocobos baulked, Cloud was forced to pull hard to keep them from fleeing. The sudden tension on the brittle leather was enough to snap it.

Cloud dove, but he was too late. There was nothing for him to grab onto. He watched in horror the birds ran across the mountain at an angle he could not possibly follow. He might have been angry about losing the birds as a sacrifice to the dragons, but it was necessary. If they weren’t appeased, the dragons would attack the town. It had not happened in Cloud’s lifetime, but his mother had pointed out the remains of several houses that had been lost the last time a tithe had not been provided when her mother had been a child.

Mayor Lockhart grabbed him by the elbow and spun him around, “You idiot boy! What have you done!?”

The snap of a dragon’s wings cut off any reply he could have made. Mayor Lockhart shook him and said, “Your family is responsible for the tithe. Have you got anything else of value to offer?”

Cloud’s temper spiked and he pulled his arm from the older man’s grip, “You know the only thing of value my family had just went over the mountain!”

Lockhart’s eyes were cold, “So be it. If all you have to offer is yourself, you will be the tithe. Fight me, and I will ensure your mother pays for it.”

Cloud straightened his clothes and reigned in his temper, turning to face his oncoming doom. As much as he disliked the mayor, he knew the man was right. There had to be a sacrifice, “Just… don’t let her starve.”

“Tifa and I will keep an eye on her this winter, I swear it.”

Cloud was not sure he believed the man, but there was nothing more he could do now.

As a child, Cloud had watched from the edge of town when the dragons came to Nibelheim. He had always been fascinated by the way they flew and how large they seemed in comparison to Mayor Lockhart and whoever was standing with him.  Even now, it was spectacular.

The dragon wound down in lazy circles, backwinging to land neatly on the rocky cliff before them. Its scales were glossy and black, shading into silver at the edges. The ridges above his eyes and the spikes protruding from his neck were that same silvery-grey. It was the dragon’s eyes, glowing the bright green Cloud had only seen in a mako fountain deep in the Nibel mountains that really caught and held his attention.

Cloud was startled to find that those eyes were filled with intelligence and studying him just as intently as he had been studying the dragon.

“Herd leader, I see no food, no gil, no tithe of any sort.” The dragon’s voice was deep, but smooth. It was far less gravely that Cloud had expected.

He was jarred out of his thoughts when Mayor Lockhart shoved him forward, “The boy’s family was responsible for the tithe. They failed to provide something up to our usual standards, so you may keep him and do with him what you wish.”

Cloud tensed when the dragon lowered his muzzle nearer to him, “What I wish?”

“Keep him to be your servant, set him free if you don’t want him…” Mayor Lockhart swallowed hard, and did his best to continue with the same tone of bland disinterest,  “Eat him. He belongs to you.”

Slowly, deliberately, the dragon inhaled. Cloud shut his eyes and waited for the gout of flame to follow. He only hoped that his mother would be able to manage without him and that Mayor Lockhart spared her the details of his death. The air that blew over his skin was heated, but did not burn him. If he was honest, it warmed the limbs that had been chilled by the cold air of the mountains.

Opening his eyes, Cloud found one of the dragon’s own glowing eyes narrowed in Mayor Lockhart’s direction, “Are you attempting to provide me a meal that is spoiled, herd leader?”

Cloud took some pleasure in the way that the color drained from Lockhart’s face. A vindictive part of himself hoped that the man fainted under the stress. Maybe he could convince the creature to take Mayor Lockhart for a tithe instead. Those thoughts died abruptly when the man’s face lit up with a conniving smile, “Quite the opposite, in fact. The boy is completely unspoilt… a virgin.”

Cloud could not imagine what difference that would make to the dragon. He also chose not to think about how the man could possibly have known that. The weight of the dragon’s gaze on him was enough to chase the thought out of his head completely. Cloud did his best to remain perfectly still as the dragon’s tongue lashed out and brushed against the side of his face and neck. Some detached part of his mind realized that the dragon had just _tasted_ him.

“I have yet to find an actual virgin in my lifetime… which has been considerable.” The dragon looked him over, lingering on his hair for a long moment before speaking again, “Is he deficient in some way? Too young, perhaps… sickly or unfit to breed?”

Cloud straightened his spine, affronted. Just because he had no interest in bedding any of his idiot neighbors did not mean he was _deficient_. The dragon seemed to notice his reaction with something like amusement, even as he turned his focus on the mayor for an answer.

“No, nothing like that.” Mayor Lockhart assured the dragon, “His family’s always been a bit odd, but his mother had no difficulty bearing him and he’s… uh… old enough for it, I suppose… why?”

The dragon snorted, a small plume of smoke billowing into the mayor’s face, “That is none of your concern. If you say he is healthy, I will take your word. If I find you have lied, I will return and raze your human lair to the ground. Now, go away.”

The dragon did not need to tell him twice. He left the plateau without giving Cloud so much as a second glance. Cloud’s stomach dropped as he waited for the dragon to make his next move. Not one to go down without a fight, Cloud said, “I’ll make a terrible meal.”

To his surprise, the dragon laughed. He had not even know dragons could laugh. That great, scaled head lowered again until his eye was level with Cloud’s face, “Then, I suppose it’s a good thing that I don’t intend to eat you.”

“You don’t?”

“I dare say you wouldn’t be worth the struggle. You’d barely be a mouthful, even if I did not share.” The dragon’s eyes were fixed on his hair again, “No, I have a much better plan for you. Come.”

The dragon’s tone was not what Cloud would have considered ominous, but the words filled him with cold dread all the same. He watched as the dragon shifted so he could form a basket with his claws. Cloud did not hesitate, afraid of angering the creature that now owned him. He would never survive a dragon chasing him down the mountain, but he knew that if he waited, a chance for escape would surely arise. The dragon shifted its claws carefully to accommodate Cloud’s body. Its skin was surprisingly warm to the touch.

Slowly, it lifted Cloud to its eye level, “What am I to call you?”

“Cloud.” He replied, “My name is Cloud.”

“Cloud.” It repeated, testing it. The word sounded pleasant and silky in the dragon’s deep voice, “I think I like that. You may keep it.”

Before Cloud could say anything else, the dragon’s claws closed around him. He desperately grabbed onto the dragon’s skin to hold on, watching the ground fall away quickly through the gaps between the dragon’s talons as it leapt into the air. His stomach gave a worrying lurch at the sudden change in altitude and uneven rocking of his seat. Cloud swallowed hard against the bile rising in his throat, afraid that the dragon would drop him if he vomited. He had never been so motivated to fight his motion sickness before in his life.

The mountain beneath them sped by as the dragon flew higher and higher. Even though he knew he should not be, Cloud was a little surprised when the temperature dropped and snow began to fall around them. They were climbing far higher into the mountains than he had ever been, probably higher than he could have ever gotten on his own. For a moment, he was actually glad of the protection of the dragon’s claws. The air inside the shelter of his improvised cage was just warm enough to keep him from shivering too badly.

Cloud could not help the squeak of surprise when the dragon banked sharply to fly straight at the sheer cliffs. He could feel the dragon’s start of surprise at the sound, its body twitching and banging into a suit of armor that had been posed beside the opening of a cave Cloud had not seen.

Cloud could hear another voice, lighter and more musical than the dragon that held him, “Is that you, Sephiroth? Did you knock over my knight?”

Sephiroth. Cloud decided the name suited the dragon. He could feel more than hear the response as the dragon pulled his arms and wings in to move through the narrow tunnel, “I’ll fix it later, promise. I was out raiding that human lair in the mountains.”

Through the gaps in Sephiroth’s claws, Cloud could see another dragon. It’s scales were a brilliant red edged in gold, smaller and leaner than Sephiroth, rolling in a sandy stone couch so he could settle his wings more comfortably against his back, “Again? You really don’t like that place, do you?”

Cloud could feel Sephiroth’s own wings twitching into place against his back, “They had an offering set out already so I didn’t have to burn it down this time.”

Cloud’s nerves were making his stomach roll. Sephiroth may have promised not to eat him, but he might have meant to let this other dragon make a snack out of him, instead. When the red dragon yawned, Cloud could see fangs glistening in the dim light of the cave, “Sheep and goats, I suppose.”

The claws holding him shifted and Cloud was face to face with Sephiroth’s snout again, “Not quite.”

Through the new opening, Cloud could see a third dragon, larger and more powerful looking than either of the two he had seen. At first, Cloud had thought him black as well, but when his tail swung over his powerful legs, Cloud could see that the scales were more of a dark blue-grey, “Not fish, I hope. They don’t keep.”

Cloud went tense all over, sure that Sephiroth had intended him as a meal for his companions all along. He had probably lied so he did not have to fight Cloud while flying. Nibelheim had long since provided the dragons with whatever foodstuff was available. Rarely, in years with a bad harvest, the dragons would accept people. None of them were ever seen again.

As soon as Sephiroth’s claws opened, Cloud tumbled to the ground. He righted himself and scrambled backwards. He wanted to put as much space between himself and the dragons as he could before they realized what he was. His hand slipped on a pile of gil coins, sending them scattering across the ground. It was more money that Cloud had ever seen in his life.

He felt himself pinned under the sharp eyes of the red dragon, “A human? What in Bahamut’s name did you go and bring one of them in for?”

“Well, that’s the offering.”

Cloud turned when the largest dragon spoke again. He wrapped his arms around his body when the dragon looked him over, cold now that he lacked the warmth of Sephiroth’s body, “What kind of offering is that? It’s awful skinny. Looks cold, too. I don’t like cold human.”

For the first time since the chocobos broke their tether, Cloud felt his muscles relax. None of the dragons seemed too enthusiastic about eating him. Maybe that had been an act the whole time. They only pretended to eat humans so they would continue to receive tithes. All the missing Nibelheimers were probably living it up in Rocket Town or somewhere else where dragons were less of a problem. It would be fine.

“What do you say, Genesis, medium rare?”

It was not fine, not fine at all. Cloud ignored the dragons, climbing to his feet so he could run. The trip down the mountain would be nearly impossible, but Cloud had to try. He was not going to let a dragon roast him and eat him. His mother would leave as soon as she realized that Mayor Lockhart had left him to the dragons. Cloud was sure of it. The rest of the town could burn, for all he cared. He ran for the mouth of the cave, hoping that Sephiroth would be too distracted by Genesis and the other dragon to stop him.

A large black tail dropped down before him, creating a barrier that would be impossible to scale before Sephiroth had him again.

Cloud spun, pressing his back against the scaly wall. The red dragon, Genesis, was leaning closer now, watching Cloud with renewed interest. He leaned his head in and inhaled deeply, “Still skinny, but it does smell… interesting.”

“That’s why it’s the offering.” Sephiroth said, his voice smug. Cloud could hear the rustle of his wings settling back against his back again, “The herd leader claims this is an actual breeding age virgin, the only one they’ve got.”

The virgin thing again. Cloud had clearly missed part of the conversation if they were back on that again. Genesis was watching him with far more interest that Cloud was comfortable with, “Virgin, eh? I’ve never had one. Every time we find a new herd, they always say they’ve no virgins at all.”

Cloud’s head jerked around when the third dragon’s tongue brushed against his arm, “They might have thought this one was too thin for breeding.”

“Stop that.” Cloud was surprised Sephiroth’s wing wrapped around him. The limb was surprisingly strong, pulling him in against Sephiroth’s body, “It’s called ‘Cloud’, it says, and I promised we wouldn’t eat it.”

“You don’t go making promises to food, Sephiroth.” The larger dragon scolded, “and you know you shouldn’t ask their names either. It’s so hard to eat them once you get attached.”

Genesis’s remark was too low for Cloud to hear, but the snarky tone made it clear that he was mocking the other dragon. Dropping back against the stone couch with a sigh, Genesis asked, “Do virgins really taste better, you suppose?”

Slowly, Cloud began edging out from under Sephiroth’s wing. There was just enough room for him to move undetected if he did not touch the dragon. Once he was past the wing and around the leg, he could make another attempt at the cave mouth.

“I wouldn’t know and it doesn’t matter.” To his surprise, the dragon lifted his wing abruptly, replacing it with a heavy wooden chest, “I brought it for Zack.”

The thick wood and metal blocked out some the words that the dragons were saying. While he had been disturbed by their conversation, he disliked not knowing what they were saying even more. His panic grew so much worse when he realized he was locked in a tiny, dark box and could not escape.

He heard Sephiroth talk about eating him again and that this “Zack” was of breeding age and needed a mate. Apparently, they had similar head spikes so Sephiroth had decided to keep him. He wondered _what_ Zack was… they were talking about eggs and training and population control. They obviously expected Cloud to _mate_ and _breed_ with Zack, whatever he was.

Cloud felt his breathing grow more rapid and shallow by the second. He tried to draw in a deeper breath and failed, panicking as the situation hit him fully. They were going to force him to breed with something. Once they realized he could not breed, they would eat him or they would keep him until they were in the mood to eat him. The whole situation was a nightmare. Cloud felt his legs give out from under him and collapsed on the stone floor.

The chest was lifted as abruptly as it had been dropped on him. Cloud drew in great, gasping breaths now that he was free of his tiny prison. Genesis swatted at Sephiroth with a wing, “Sephiroth, you great gecko, you forgot airholes.”

Cloud was surprised to find that Sephiroth looked genuinely contrite as he looked Cloud over. To the side of them, the largest dragon was nudging his nose against something in the vicinity of his hind leg, “Zack, dear… Here, Zackie! Here, boy! Wake up! Sephiroth brought you a present.”

The tone reminded him of one that a neighbor had once used while calling a pet dog. Cloud was not sure what he was expecting, but the dark haired young man that slid down the third dragon’s leg was not it.

The dragon was making the oddest little noises in the man, Zack’s, direction. To Cloud’s shock, Zack leaned up and butted his head against the dragon’s jaw, his eyes still closed. It was obvious the man had been sleeping only moments before,  “Mmm? Present?”

Cloud stumbled when Sephiroth pushed him towards Zack with his wing, “A new friend.”

Genesis was leaning in again, looking back and forth between Zack and Cloud, “Oh, I hope they don’t fight.”

Cloud could see the moment when Zack came to full wakefulness. His eyes were bright, eager, “Friend? Awesome!”

The man jumped down from the dragon’s couch and crossed the cave in a few quick strides. He could not have been much older than Cloud himself. He was dressed in clothes that looked both comfortable and warm, obviously meant for sleeping. His hair was a disordered spikey mess and Cloud realized that Sephiroth must have noticed the similarity in their… head spikes. _Oh._

Cloud had not realized he was shivering until he felt Zack’s warm hands chafing his arms, “Hey, are you okay? What’s your name?”

Around them, the dragons looked on far to eagerly. Cloud hunched his shoulders and focused on Zack. He had done something to win their favor and Cloud was determined to figure out what it was to save his own skin, “Are they going to eat me? The black one said he wouldn’t but I don’t know about these other two.”

“What, them?” Zack’s grin was lopsided as he spared a quick, affectionate glance up at the dragons, “Nah. I’m pretty sure they’re keeping you.”

Cloud felt a hysterical laugh bubbling up in his chest. The man was obviously insane. That was the only way he could be so comfortable with the monsters who had taken them hostage, “For what? Afternoon tea?”

Zack shook his head, hands stilling in surprise, “No, no… Look, I’m Zack. Angeal here picked me up when I was knee high to a goat. He could have eaten me, but they decided to let me live here instead… and now you’re here, too.”

“They’re not going to eat me?” Cloud asked, a shiver going down his spine as he looked at the largest dragon again, Angeal. The smile on the dragon’s face was downright unnatural. Sephiroth’s earlier laughter had been strange enough.

Zack made a sympathetic noise in his throat and wrapped an arm around Cloud’s shoulders, “Don’t you worry, buddy. I won’t let ‘em. What’s your name?”

Cloud fell into step with Zack when he realized that the dark haired man was leading him toward a door in the back that would be too small for the dragons to easily follow, “Cloud.”

“Come on, Cloud. Let me show you around.” Cloud was thankful for the warmth of the taller man against his side. Now that the adrenaline of his kidnapping was wearing off, he was freezing, “I have a great set-up in the back, a real bed and everything.”

Cloud followed Zack, letting the man wrap him in furs and assurances that all was not lost. Zack’s “set-up” was remarkable, a giant, soft bed heaped in furs and pillows dominated a space in front of a crackling fireplace. One wall was covered by bookshelves that were full of books. Another wall had a second door that led to a bathing area, according to Zack.

Zack showed him where he kept his food and offered some of his own, warmer clothes until something could be found that would fit him better. Slowly, Cloud found himself relaxing in Zack’s company. The man was cheerful and kind, and if he was going to be kept by those monsters, at least he had someone to go through it with. After a while, he even let Zack tug him onto the bed and did not complain when the older man set a pillow in his lap and urged Cloud to lay his head down on it.

“Don’t worry… I’ll keep an eye on you while you rest up, okay?” Zack patted him on the head, “You’ve had a shock, but you’ll be alright. Promise.”

Cloud pulled the furs around him more tightly, his eyes heavy. He really was tired. If Zack said he would be safe here, Cloud decided to trust him until he was proven wrong. Cloud was nearly asleep when he heard Genesis’s voice from the main part of the cave.

“Human mating looks odd. They’re just _sitting_ there!”

Somewhere behind him, Sephiroth called Genesis a tactless iguana and Angeal scolded him for spying on the pets while they “got to know” one another. Zack collapsed into helpless, gasping laughter and Cloud realized just how strange his life was about to become. 


End file.
